Just because I'm losing doesn't mean I'm lost.

I may be jumping the gun...
It's too early to tell...
I really shouldn't be opening my mouth right now...
And truly, I should not count my chickens before they hatch...
Or say anything until I'm positive...

But I think I have a new obsession.

And it's kind of causing me to take back a statement I made a few entries ago. Remember when I told you I would submit to the need to workout, but probably never have the desire? Uh huh. Yup. Ok. Fine. Might have been wrong on that one. You see, I'd been dragging my ass to the gym and onto cardio equipment and frankly, that's just not all that fun.

So last night, I went to a MegaMix Aerobics class and sweated and giggled my ass off. I enjoyed it so much, in fact, that this morning I awoke full of energy, checked the class schedule, and bolted out the door for Kickboxing. I enjoyed THAT so much that after class, I marched myself upstairs and requested a personal trainer to show me the weights and machines.

And now, there is not one room in that gym that I do not OWN.

And the mirrors I once feared are slowly becoming my friends. Because at the gym, the mirrors are not there to foster narcissism or elevate flaws. They're there to help you...to reflect body positioning and focus on improvement. Today, in the middle of my side kicks and jabs and hooks, roundhouses and upper cuts, I gazed into that mirror and saw an Alison drenched in sweat but somehow glowing, with shining eyes and a great big smile. And there, in that mirror, plain as day, was something I have never seen.

My neck.

To the population at large, neck sightings might not rank as breaking news, worthy of blog entries. But to this no-neck monster, it's exactly the kind of thing I need to see. As I stretched off the squats and rolled through the pain, my body made me aware of every muscle group, leaving me strong and capable.

Perhaps I've broken through a barrier. I feel like my life has kind of settled itself into some blase form of normalcy lately, and I'm thrilled for a new focus.